Sometimes You Really Do Have to Say What You Mean

When is asking important, by asking I mean actually forming a distinct question and awaiting an answer. Sometimes this trips me up b/c we swing between implied asking where I make a statement and assume consent when it isn't countered and me needing to make an actual request. The confusing thing is when the formal request is absolutely necessary. We don't have any type of signal that says "this situation calls for a specific request and woe be unto you to to go about your merry way assuming the other way would work fine"  It's kind of funny that I'm still navigating this nearly 8 yrs later. Although I am starting to catch on to a few clues such as when it involves others I'd do better to err on the side of formality. As much as I add errands and change stuff at the last minute when I'm on my own it goes over way worse when I do it when I'm out with someone else. I think it has something to do with looking like I assume I'll be allowed to do whatever.  My thinking has always been if I say X and he doesn't say no then he's saying that he's ok with it, obviously a mistake on my part.  Live and learn and learn and learn until I actually absorb it, lol.