Adventures in Emmieland

I've been having a lot of fun playing with the beauty apps and I found one that uses my own body to try on wedding dresses. I don't even want to see my data usage at the end of the month, lol. On the other hand having that stuff to do combined with buying free kindle books has kept me off Amazon (mostly) I swear having a mental issue in which shopping is a symptom blows. So many pretty things want me to buy them! The last couple of days I've been sick, nothing major just a cold and exhaustion but it sure does bring my lack of energy to the forefront. Darn body just isn't cooperating with me. I got into a discussion today about politics with a woman who is extremely politically knowledgeable and to my surprise I was able to hold up my end in an intelligent and thoughtful manner. All those hours of Das going on and on obviously soaked in. I don't think I'm dumb but I know I'm not well informed on certain topics so it was nice not to have to just sit and no...

I have been playing with a couple of makeover apps on my phone. I am in little girl heaven! It's like having a Barbie head but with my face. And the clothing ones are like playing paper dolls. I always loved dolls and make up so I have a new toy. So glad I got the 64GB phone so there is plenty of room for my silliness.  One thing I noticed is that I look so different in make up. For playing it's great but I like looking like me in daily life. While I am quick to slap on some lipstick that's about it for my Beaty regiment outside moisturizing.  Tomorrow I'll play more with the wigs. 

I'm begining to think I need to keep a small notepad with me at all times. Throughout the day I have ideas and questions for blogging come into my head but when I actually sit down to blog, nothing. This evening I was scrolling through Amazon updating my wish list when I got the urge to look for kinky stuff. There is an amazing amount of paddles, crops,whips and bondage gear on Amazon. Some of it was obviously more for looks than anything else but some of it looked to be decent quality mean to hurt. I now have a fetish wishlist, lol. In making it I proved to myself that I'm more of a masochist than previously thought since I kept adding items I know will be evil.  I also checked out clubwear/lingerie because we will eventually make it to an event and I want to be cute. We're scheduled to go to a local munch next month. I'm excited, it's been a while and it is all too easy to isolate here. As it is I'm avaeraging leaving the house about once a week and that...

Our disagreements tend to be short lived and fairly low key but I have noted over the years that neither of us like to apologize.  I really don't know why for me saying I'm sorry feels like getting a root canal, I'm not opposed to actually being wrong and I will make amends and overtures but getting the words out is painful.  It drives me crazy because I am thinking "I'm sorry" but I can't say it. Always more personal growth to go.

We talked about M/s tonight, as we do, and I started thinking about what exactly defines it. Also what is that thing you feel when someone you come across someone who is dominant.  It occurred to me that in M/s if you are high protocol from the beginning and down the road relax them it can feel like you've lost your dynamic. Conversely it can also feel like you have more of a dynamic than you actually do because all the bows and permissions are so much in play that you don't have to think about who you are together. None of that actually defines it for me though. What does is something I'm still figuring out. It is so often easier to exclude than include when I'm trying to work something through in my head.  As to what is that elusive thing that makes me sit up and take notice of a dominant man (for me it doesn't bing  with women which I attribute to sexual orientation) I don't know what that is either. Once again I can tell if it's missing but I couldn'...

I tried something different every day except that day I never got out of my pajamas. :)  I'm liking skirts but need more tights, well in my world you can never have enough tights. I have 2 pair of leggings and a couple of sweaters that went to a friend's house too so eventually I'll go get them and increase my wardrobe! I've got my eye on a couple of cropped cardigans too...

Yesterday was my birthday and we went to a cool resturant. I wanted to try something new food wise and I know Das likes spicy food so we went to a place that served a variety of West Indian food. The best shrimp ever! I took a few pictures with my birthday camera. When it warms up I'll do more exploring in the area, I know there are hiking trails through the park but right now it's minus 7 C so i'll keep my buns inside staying warm with tea and hot chocolate.   It's been nice that things with Das have picked up a bit, he's been not forceful exactly but more solidly reminding me of him being the boss. I like that which i think makes me a little weird but it is what it is.  I was reading a D/s romance novel earlier this week and noticed that the characters all really disliked slaves. The slaves were cast as incompetent and or lazy people who didn't know how to live in the adult world. I am not sure how that became the popular view of slaves vs...

Still working on finding my style. Sadly it's linked heavily to my moods so quite changeable. This weeks new looks were in my opinion two hits one miss. 

I was thinking about mastery and sadism the other day. It seems that when someone is a sadist it is also often assumed that they are masters but when someone is a master who isn't a sadist their is confusion about how that is possible. Although I don't think the two have to be linked I must say there is something to the use of sadism in the expression of mastery. (I'm working from the assumption that the master has a slave) What I haven't been able to figure out is why this is the case. Das offered the explanation that in its crudest form slavery is a state wherein out of fear for their life a person submits to another rather than risk death. A person who refuses to submit is either killed or overpowers those seeking their submission and becomes a master themselves. Obviously things aren't so extreme when discussion the state of consensual M/s (usually) but I do think there is something in there that rings true. Sadism used in M/s as a tool reinforces the power ...

I found a wedding dress design app and it's so addictive. It's like playing paper dolls but on the computer so none of those stupid tabs falling off. So far just since last night I've made up 3 dresses.  One thing it made me painfully aware of is the fact that I will have to have the dress made. My body so does not do off the rack, lol. We celebrated our wedding anniversary yesterday by attending mass at a new church, then spending too much at the grocery store and coming home to "nap". In the evening we decided to create our own sing along and basically were silly until we wore ourselves out. It was a very good day. I managed to pull out some regular clothes for church. Still no pants but at least a skirt. After putting it on I didn't like the way the pencil skirt hit below my needs so since it was high waisted I pulled it up so that I had a longish mini going. I think I'm having a fashion crisis, lol. Gotta work on these front on pics, talk about unf...